when i was a child i used to think teens were grown ups and when i was a teen i thought college students were grown ups and now that im a college student im just like what the hell is a grown up anymore
Now that I’m older than college age I’ve concluded that grown ups are a myth.
(Source: nylirehssuer, via prettyvintagesex)
*names his child Oscar*
"Would you like to hold h-"
"Say it like we rehearsed it."
*sighs* "And the Oscar goes to..."
→ A Marathon Away
The manual says: “Rest.”
The manual does not say
"You will sleep for sixteen hours,
stumbling out of sweat and
slumber only for the bathroom
and, at hour thirteen, oatmeal.
You are thirty-six years old
and today’s accomplishment
The manual says: “Medicine.”
my grandpa used to water the plants every week and there was a lil frog that would come out and croak until my grandpa sprinkled some water on him and he loved that frog so much